too young?

May. 11th, 2003 10:04 am
athene: (3vil)
[personal profile] athene
Friday Aerith and I went and got some info on morgages and made appointments to look at 2 apartments for sale in our current complex. We also looked at a place to rent. There is just so much stuff that I didn't even think about that you need to do when buying a place. I guess I would feel better if we had a couple thousand in savings, but we don't.
I feel like I'm too young to be buying a house. That I have a lot of "life" in front of me before I want to "settle down". I don't really know what I'm doing yet. I'm sort of wandering through life right now. I don't think I have the age/wisdom to come to this decision yet. And I'm scared. And I feel trapped. I didn't want to have to think about this for another year, but it is being forced on me. I don't know what to do and I'm scared that I'll make the wrong decission and be misserable for a long time or be stuck in something I can't get out of.

I don't want to be here forever.
I don't want to do this forever.
I wish I knew what I wanted.
I wish my path was laid out clearly before me.
It used to be.
It used to be so simple.
I don't know anymore.
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